The Looney Tunes Show Fan Mail/Episode 9

From Teleram Wiki

Opening[edit | edit source]

  • Daffy: (in a bad imitation of Count Dracula) Hello, hello, hello, it is I, your host, Daffy Duck! (laughs evilly)
  • Bugs: Actually, the correct term is 'co-host', since I'm a host too.
  • Daffy: (in normal voice) Whatever. Now start asking questions, people!! (in Dracula voice) Or I vill drrrink your vlood! Mwahaha.

Question #1[edit | edit source]

  • Bugs: So here's a question asked by Doctor Bugs: "Roadrunner, what were your first ENGLISH words?"
  • The Roadrunner: Meep meep!
  • Bugs: Uh, no, he meant English words.
  • Roadrunner: (sounding annoyed) Meep meep!
  • Daffy: C'mon, road runner, say something besides 'meep'!
  • Roadrunner: (in a deep, somewhat scary voice) Meep. Meep.
  • Daffy: Never mind...

Question #2[edit | edit source]

  • Daffy: Here's one from some guy named Rock-O-Jello: "Bugs, why are you so obsessed with doctors?"
  • Bugs: Well, they're intelligent, they're helpful, and they encourage you to eat carrots. Surely someone who makes you eat carrots can't be evil, right? (nudges Daffy)
  • Daffy: Yep. But don't call me Shirley.

Question #3[edit | edit source]

  • Porky: R-Rock-O-Jello a-asked "To anyone: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" G-g-g-gosh, I w-went a lot of tr-trouble saying that.
  • Bugs: That's easy, Doc. A real no-brainer. A woodchuck would chuck so much wood he wouldn't know how much wood he chucked.
  • Daffy: A woodchuck would chuck.. ch-chuck.. could chuck woodchuck wood... (groans) Stupid tongue twisters!!

Question #4[edit | edit source]

  • Daffy: Mrjoshbumstead asked: "Hey Bugs! Do you withat Homer Simpson was your father? If not, then why?"
  • Bugs: I am going to assume 'withat' is a typo of 'want'. If so, then no, I don't want him to be my father. I'm a rabbit. He's a human being. How can he be my dad? Besides, he eats donuts and beer all the time, and smells like a sewer.
  • Homer Simpson: No, Bugs... I am your father.
  • Bugs: NO!!!!!
  • Bart Simpson: No, you're MY father, unfortunately for me. C'mon, Dad, you must be drunk again. (leads Homer out of the room)
  • Daffy: Okay.. what was that all about?

Question #5[edit | edit source]

  • Bugs: Rock-O-Jello asked: "Michigan, why do you only sing in front of The Construction-Worker?"
  • Michigan J. Frog: (in a singsong voice) To teach him a lesson. I knew from the start he was going to use me for money the moment he saw me singing and dancing.

Question #6[edit | edit source]

  • Bugs: Professor Duck asked: "Porky, Why did you wear pants only in the cartoon, 'Tick Tock Tuckered'?"
  • Porky: W-well, me and D-Daffy were going to w-w-work, and I f-f-figured that the b-boss wouldn't l-like it if he saw me g-g-g-goin' around, not wearing any p-pants.
  • Daffy: Then how come you don't wear any pants at your new job?
  • Porky: The b-boss doesn't see me oft-often. And I don't see YOU wearing any pants! At least I wear something!
  • Daffy: I AM wearing something. It's called "feathers".

Question #7[edit | edit source]

  • Bugs: Rock-O-Jello asked: "Granny, at the age of 95, is June Foray older or younger than you?"
  • Granny: Why, we're exactly the same age!
  • Daffy: Boy, you're OLD!
  • Granny: (scoffs) You should see my parents. They're 130 and still alive!
  • Daffy: (faints)

Question #8[edit | edit source]

  • Bugs: Josh asked: "Wile E. Coyote, why is it you use your money to by Acme props instead of buying cooked Road Runner at a butcher shop?"
  • Wile E. Coyote [holds up sign]: "Dude, I've been buying Acme stuff for decades, I'm not going to switch to butcher shops in two seconds. Besides, I want to eat 'em fresh."

Question #9[edit | edit source]

  • Daffy: "Thith question was athked by Rock-O-Jello: 'Hubie and Bertie, how come you haven't appeared in a single cartoon since the 1950s?'"
  • Hubie: "Eh, some coyote-and-roadrunner duo came along and took the spotlight from us. Ain't that right, Boit?"
  • Bertie: "Yeah, yeah, sure, sure."
  • Bugs: "Funny you should say that; Daffy feels the very same way about me! [Giggle]"
  • Daffy: "Thath it; where's the director? I want a different thcreen partner."
  • Crusher: "You could be with me. [Snarls menacingly]"
  • Daffy: "[Whimpers fearfully] I change my mind."

Question #10[edit | edit source]

  • Bugs: "This question was asked by MrJoshbumstead: 'Bugs, are you and Daffy scared of Slender Man?'"
  • Daffy: "[Scoff] Thlender Man isn't real."
  • [Slender Man walks into the room behind Daffy]
  • [Daffy screams and runs]
  • Slender Man: "What's his problem?"
  • Bugs: "Everything."

Question #11[edit | edit source]

  • Daffy: "Thith question was athked by Doctor Bugs: 'Taz, what is your favorite food?'"
  • The Tasmanian Devil: "Taz like rabbits!"
  • Bugs: "No, you don't. Tasmanian devils like ducks, not rabbits."
  • The Tasmanian Devil: "Ok!" [Turns into tornado; chases Daffy]
  • Porky: "Th-th-that's all, folks!"

Voice Cast[edit | edit source]

  • Teleram as Daffy Duck, Porky Pig, The Crusher
  • Doctor Bugs as Bugs Bunny, Hubie, Michigan J. Frog
  • MrJoshbumstead as The Roadrunner, Bart Simpson
  • Rock-O-Jello as The Tasmanian Devil
  • KitKat1894 as Granny
  • Thomas D. Coyote as Homer Simpson, Bertie
  • ProfessorDuck as Slender Man